My Story and Why Shameless Money Exists

Despite being a Certified Financial Planner, I hit rock bottom with money. Impulsive spending, abandoned budgets, and mounting debt became my reality - even though I knew exactly HOW to manage money. That's the thing about ADHD and finances: knowing what to do isn't enough when shame and executive function challenges get in the way.

The Early Years

I was diagnosed with ADHD at 16, but even before that, I knew something was different. As a child, I would spend hours alone in our basement, creating complex stories and worlds with my Hot Wheels cars. While imagination can be beautiful, it was also an escape from a world where I felt increasingly disconnected and behind.

School was particularly challenging. Though I maintained good grades, it masked a deeper struggle. I appeared conscientious on the surface, but inside I was constantly battling to stay focused and connected. Social anxiety began creeping in during middle school as I struggled to maintain meaningful friendships, leaving me wondering why connecting with others felt so much harder for me than it seemed to be for everyone else.

Some of my most painful experiences came through athletics, particularly soccer. Despite being a good athlete, I would consistently mess up drills in practice. Coaches would make examples of me in front of my teammates - one even asked if I had come to practice "high," while another called me "retarded" in front of everyone. These experiences planted deep seeds of shame and self-doubt that would haunt me for years.

Like many with ADHD, I developed coping mechanisms that seemed to work on the surface. I excelled academically, earned my CFA charter (passing a notoriously difficult exam with just a 27% pass rate), and landed a position at a large investment firm right out of college.

The Corporate Years

The structured environment of corporate finance suited my ADHD brain well. I was promoted to Senior Analyst within six months. From the outside, it looked like I had it all figured out.

The Turning Point

Then came a pivotal career shift - I joined my father's financial advisory practice. Going from a highly structured corporate environment to a more autonomous role exposed all the cracks in my coping systems. Without external accountability, my ADHD challenges came rushing to the surface.

Despite my professional knowledge of financial planning, my personal finances spiraled. I made impulsive purchases, engaged in risky trading, and watched my savings evaporate. The shame of being a financial professional who couldn't manage his own money was crushing.

The Wake-Up Call

My wake-up call came when I discovered my UTMA account - money my father had set aside for my college education. Instead of feeling grateful, I saw it as an opportunity to finally "fix" my life through a series of increasingly reckless financial decisions. Within months, I had not only depleted those funds but also accumulated significant credit card debt.

The anxiety, shame, and crushing realization of what I'd done left me in the worst mental state I could remember. I felt like a fraud - how could I advise others about money when I couldn't manage my own?

The Breakthrough

In 2021, I stumbled across Dr. Edward Hallowell's book "Delivered from Distraction." For the first time, I understood that my struggles weren't character flaws - they were symptoms of my ADHD. This revelation was utterly life-changing. It was eerie how well the book understood me, and it began helping me piece together the story of my life, realizing how many of my hardships were linked to my ADHD.

Finding Faith and Purpose

During this transformative period in 2021, something unexpected happened. Shortly after my ADHD reawakening, a friend invited me to church. I wasn't seeking God, but in that moment, God found me and accepted me - despite my flaws, financial mistakes, and all. That spiritual transformation gave me a new perspective on my worth beyond my financial situation and helped me start addressing my shame from a place of grace rather than judgment.

Creating Change

I began developing systems that worked with my ADHD brain instead of against it. As I healed my relationship with money through a combination of practical strategies and spiritual growth, I recognized an opportunity to help others who were struggling with the same challenges.

The Infocus Years

In 2020, I launched InFocus Wealth Strategies, a financial planning firm specifically focused on serving clients with ADHD. Over the next four years, working exclusively with the ADHD community taught me invaluable lessons about the unique challenges these clients face. While traditional financial planning helped many clients, I began to notice a pattern: for many people with ADHD, shame and emotional barriers around money needed to be addressed before traditional financial planning could be effective.

Birth of Shameless Money

That's when Shameless Money was born. Through my work at InFocus, I recognized a critical gap in the market. Many people with ADHD needed help breaking free from financial shame and building confidence before they were ready for comprehensive financial planning. They needed someone who understood both the practical and emotional challenges of managing money with ADHD.

Our Mission Today

At Shameless Money, we believe that having ADHD doesn't condemn you to a life of financial chaos. While my faith informs my personal approach to money and shame, our guidance is designed to serve everyone, regardless of their spiritual beliefs. We're here to help you transform your relationship with money through:

• Shame-free guidance that acknowledges the real challenges of managing money with ADHD
• Practical strategies designed specifically for ADHD brains
• Tools and systems that work with your natural tendencies instead of against them
• A supportive environment where you can be completely honest about your money struggles

Whether you're dealing with the ADHD tax, trying to break free from impulsive spending, or working to build lasting financial habits, you're not alone. Your ADHD brain isn't broken - it just needs a different approach to money management.

For those ready for comprehensive financial planning and investment management, our sister company InFocus Wealth Strategies continues to serve the ADHD community with specialized planning services. But for many, the journey starts here - with breaking free from financial shame and building the confidence needed to take control of your financial future.

Let's break free from financial shame together and build the confident, stable financial future you deserve.

-David DeWitt, CFP® (A work in progress)